I feel my crisis

Today was paid holiday. So in the morning I thought what to do. But I have a only idea that was going to cafe and read the book. I felt it was crisis because I couldn't come up with what I wanted to do. 
I went to cafe and thought that 1 hour, but I could write only 50 things. It was so terrible because it proof that I'm living without the mind I enjoy my life.

It's the time I think deeply what and how I want to live. If I die now, I can't be satisfied with my life. I need to change the way to spent the time I live.